Said With Love

I like to think my time in Russia forced me to be more cognizant of cultural differences and sensitized to other norms. Sometimes they still had to hit me in the face, however, before awareness was fostered. We tend to function in our own world until we consciously step outside of it.

This week I had a conversation with a new survivor who has experienced homelessness for a season. With new facial grafts that will take time to mature, her return to the community at large concerns me. I shared a tool called STEPS from the Phoenix Society. The acronym stands for Self Talk, Tone of Voice, Eye Contact, Posture, Smile. How a person presents him or herself matters. People will often take their cues from us. If we are friendly and confident, it can foster the same vibe to whomever we meet.

After listening to my little lecture, my new friend raised her left eyebrow and said, “Mona, an angry persona keeps me safe out there. Your tool makes no sense in my world.”

OUCH.

But said with love. Cultural relevancy ignored on my part. I apologized for my insensitivity and asked what would truly help her in the coming days from her own pool of wisdom and experience.

Another lesson revisited on the journey of life…

 

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